10 Things That All Wellness Bloggers Need To Stop Doing
It is not lost on me that, at times, bloggers can be annoying. Hell, humans can be annoying! I’ve been in the wellness blogging world for a long ass time now, so I like to think that I know my way around. I’ve seen it all- the good, the bad, and the vegan.
I did a poll on my Instagram last week asking people whatdrives them crazy about people in the health and wellness space, and I couldn’t stop shouting “YES!” and laughing at all the answers. I love you, fellow bloggers. I love what we do and what our mission is out in the world. I also love not taking ourselves too seriously from time to time.
The humble brag.
I love these new yoga leggings so much! They are so comfy and held up great during by 370 mile run this morning before work. Anybody else like to pretend they're running towards Ryan Gosling on a workout?? LOL!!
Becoming overnight experts.
Reads one article and immediately becomes subject matter expert. Are you just jumping on the bandwagon or have you actually experienced the depths of wellness hell? I don’t want you to just tell me that juicing is good for me, I want to hear what kind of stuff was coming out of your body on day five to know that you really lived through some shit.
Or just acting like medical professionals in general.
DON’T TAKE MEDICAL ADVICE FROM RANDOM PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET THAT MIGHT BE CATFISHING YOU. THAT 35 YEAR OLD WOMAN COULD REALLY BE A 14 YEAR OLD BOY IN NOVA SCOTIA.
Go see a doctor. Or an alternative medicine doctor. Or just somebody with any sort of actual training or experience. PLEASE.
Creating insane expectations.
“It’s super easy. You just wake up at 4 AM, meal prep for 32 people, do a 90 minute Bikram class, journal for an hour, sit in a sauna, and then I go to work!”
Doing yoga in dangerous places.
Do you normally practice yoga on a cliff? Do you normally practice yoga in a bikini on a rock where waves are crashing? Are you normally in the middle of the field doing crow pose? Do people hold classes at the end of this dock on a remote lake? Are you really sure you should be headstanding on top of that car? Where are your clothes? Did somebody steal them? Should I call the cops?
Ignoring the "before" part of their journey.
I don’t care what Beyonce says, you did not wake up like this. At one point you lived off of Ramen and beer just like the rest of us did in our early twenties and your biggest workout was running to catch the bus. Be honest.
Shaming their followers about how anybody can do it.
Actually, not anybody can do it JANET because all of us have different lives. That’s great that you can go sit at a day spa all day, but we have shit to do, missy.
*Janet is not a real person. I apologize if any Janets feel personally victimized by this post.
Using mystery ingredients that nobody can find.
NOT ALL OF US CAN SHOP AT A SPECIALTY GROCERY STORE FOR VANILLA BEANS THAT WERE BLESSED BY A MONK ON SOME MOUNTAIN TOP OK?!
Calling workouts or mega lifestyle changes "easy".
. Getting your ass out of bed to go to a workout class and get yelled at for 45 minutes isn’t neatly as fun as staying in bed with your dog, but you’ll probably feel like a queen after. Eating salads is not as fun as slamming back five donuts, but they haven’t yet figured out how to make tasty donuts out of vegetables, so this is just what our life is like right now.
Promoting products ALL THE TIME.
Buy me dinner first, OK?! I want to know the real you before you sell me your laxative tea. I want to know about the time you farted on somebody in yoga class, the time that a juice cleanse made you shit your pants, and to see what you really look like when you’re at home chilling in a face mask. If after all that crap you want to sell me something, chill. Also, SKINNY TEA IS JUST LAXATIVES. There, I said it.