Sweaty Girl Gift Guide
Let's call it like it is, shall we? We could call this the fit girl gift guide or the yoga gift guide but no matter what kind of fitness your loved one is into they all have one thing in common: sweat. She's probably always really fucking sweaty. He probably is so sweaty that he doesn't know what it feels like to not be sweaty anymore. Sweat is life. Life is sweat.
Rather than tell you about a bunch of really expensive fitness products that you'll likely never buy, this seemed like the perfect opportunity to tell you about all my faves. You see, I've been doing this for a while. I've been sweaty for years. I really know my stuff. I also smell really, really, bad.
Looking to buy some new goodies for yourself? For your crazy yoga friend? For your friend who won't stop going on excessively long runs?
I got you.
A few nights ago after teaching a triple I got in the car. The car smelled...ripe. I realized, in horror, that I had been sitting my sweaty-ass on the same seat for about a year, and my poor little 'roo was starting to smell as bad as my yoga bag. I immediately whipped out my phone and ordered a Seat Hoody- a product I've been lusting after for months but finally realized I desperately needed in my car.
The Seat Hoody is basically just a cute yoga towel for your car. The Hoody comes on and off easily and can be thrown in the wash no problemo, so you no longer have to worry about that nasty stale sweat smell haunting your car. Their prints are very on trend and bohemian. The hoodies also run less than $40 a pop after shipping, so you can invest in a few if you want.
The B Mat
For about two seconds of my life I was a barre teacher. It was a FUN and hard method to teach, I just realized that doing 5 million things at once was maybe not the best for me and that a day off might be nice. So I left, but I still find myself tiny-lifting from time to time in my living room and dreaming of my headset. ANYWAY, the barre studio that I taught at had the best yoga mats that I've seen thus far. I'm a Jade mat babe myself, but when that sucker dies (gimme like...20 years), a B Mat will be my next purchase. B Mats are crazy sticky. You don't need a towel to stay put. They also come in extra long which is perfect for the dudes or really tall ladies (raises hand) in your life. Their company is lady-run and they put minimal crap in their mats, which I particularly appreciate since I spend a lot of time rubbing my almost-nude body all over my mats. I love B Mats so much that I've already talked 5 yogis I know into buying them. They're just rad. Oh, and affordable! Their lightweight mat runs for under $50. You need one.
When I first got really into yoga I was a strong believe that yoga-specific towels were totaly BS. I had convinced myself that my crappy old beach towels were just as good- if not better- than the towels being sold at my studio. I believed I was more evolved than those sucker yogis who were throwing their money at stupid towels with hospital-sock grips. What did they know?!
Well, the second I tried my first Yogitoes towel I quickly changed my tune. Yogitoes do not slip (hospital-sock technology!), they wash just like a regular towel, and they hold up really well. My cute stepmom bought me a pack of them for Christmas three years ago and they're still going strong. And I use mine every day at work.
High-waisted Onzie pants
You know when you're taking class and you keep having to stop to pull your pants up? Like, you're a strong independent woman and you will gladly go shirtless in class cellulite and all but at the same time you don't want to show everybody your butthole? Do you know what I mean? I've been a huge fan of Onzie pants since day one of my yoga practice, but I fell even more in love with them this year when I realized that they sold high waisted versions of their products. I'm taking pants, capris, AND shorts. These puppies will not fall down. They refuse to fall down. They also hit at the exact point on my body that it makes me looking like I'm covering up a fierce six pack. I have three pairs. This number is painfully small. I need at least 100 more.
I love the idea of positive affirmation cards but have always internally rolled my eyes big time at the super flowery ones most yogis drool over. I get that they might be your thing, but they drive me bonkers. You know what I'm talking about- the Earth mother will shine on you from her heart chakra and you will find blessings buried underneath your sits-bones whilst you chant the mantra of your people. Namaste. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!
I love Affirmators because they give you all the daily inspiration that you need while also being hilarious which we can all use in the morning. Your yogi friend will love these, but so will your college-aged cousin who lives for playing beer pong. House rules, amirite?!
Stop killing the earth and buy yourself a damn water bottle, OK?! Hydro Flasks are my current fave because they keep cold drinks cold. They also, allegedly, keep hot things hot, but I have yet to experience any kind of desire to drink a hot beverage before or after working out. Seriously- I even order my coffee with ice in it because I just want to get the job done. The job being to caffeinate the crap out of myself. These flasks will also be around long enough for you to pass on to your grandchildren, so resist the urge to whine about the price-point.
To ease my perpetual dehydration, I used to have a nasty coconut water habit that quickly started ruining my life (read:it was getting spendy). Electrolyte sports drinks aren't really my jam either. I was creeping around on the internet a few months ago and came across LyteShow- concentrated electrolyte drops that had incredible reviews. I was starting to get headaches from sweating so much. I knew that if I wanted to keep teaching as much I had to find a good solution before my body completely crapped out on me. Thankfully, LyteShow has been a godsend. One bottle lasts me about a month, and I use it about twice a day. The taste is pretty salty (because, duh, you're replacing the electrolytes in your body), but I've found that when I throw it in my morning smoothie I don't notice a thing. Active humans everywhere need this in their lives. Also, a friend once told me this was an incredible hangover cure!
It's me. I'm the friend.
Trust me, if she's doing lots of workouts she could DEFINITELY benefit from some more dry shampoo in her life. As could the dudes with the long hair. I am a firm believe that you can never have too much dry shampoo. Batiste is my fave, and also smells the best!